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when is a good time to give up b/f and how

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14/12/2009 at 23:19

hello

i have been bf now for 11 months and i always said that once my baby is 1 i will give up. yet that time is creeping ever nearer and i just dont feel ready to do it. am i being daft? should i carry on or should i call it a day? would be really interested in other peeps opinions on this. i know that she no longer needs my breast milk but i had all manner of probs at the begining i feel like i ned to make up for lost time. i also think she may be my last baby so giving up will be the end of an era. going through tough times too so its like a security blanket for me!

please give me your opinion on this subject and also advice on how to stop. i only feed twice a day so its not a big deal but i certainly dont want to get problems again. let me know what you think xxxx

15/12/2009 at 08:08

Hiya natty

i also always planned to get to 1 year with theo then stop and was extrememly proud of myself for making it that far so well done you!! by the time theo was nearing his first birthday we were down to just one feed a day which was first thing in the morning - i would bring him in bed when he woke up and give him a love and a feed. He gladly took the feed but i know he didnt really need it. As we got closer and closer to his birthday he started to show less and less interest in the feed, he would take some but come off very quickly - it was def more habit than need. also he started nibbling a bit which there was no way i was putting up with so when ever he did that i stopped him feeding - if he did it twice i just stopped his feed that day. It was incredibly easy to stop, although like you, the nearer the time came the more i clung on to the fact that i didnt want to stop! but in the end i left it to him, he started showing less interest, then id maybe not offera feed every other day or so and he wasnt looking for it so i just weaned him like that and it took about a week - but he has never showed an interest again.

The thing is, every baby is different and every mum is different - if you are still happy feeding and she is still happy taking it why stop? plenty of people continue to feed past 1 year old, esp if it is just one or two feeds a day.

my advice would be try shortening the feeds and reducing to one feed a day and see how you get on - but let baby guide you as the more you push the more she might cling on to it!

good luck xx

15/12/2009 at 17:43

Natty I feel exactly the same as you hun,

Im at the same stage with Carla and said I would give up once she turns one. The advice they give is to breastfeed until your child is one and even longer if you are comfortable with it  So they really recommend feeding past a year!!

I am just going to take it as it comes with Carla and I have a feeling she will stop when she is ready as many  babies do. But as long as you are happy to continue feeding her  then keep at it. I dont think you will have problems when it comes to stopping feeding because of it only being 2 feed a day. I  do the same with Carla and I certainly never feel full like I used to.

As for the whole missing the closeness and bond it brings try to remember that Molly is getting older now and there are going to be so many new things that you can do together and expereience together!!          

 If you wanna chat give  me a shout    xxx      

15/12/2009 at 20:57

Hi,

I fed my daughter till she was nearly one and I had real issues to begin with as she refused point blank to drink from a bottle at all, if it wasn't boob then she wasn't having it! (It wasn't an issue most of the time it just meant I couldn't leave her with my oh at all)  Because of this I stopped very gradually as it took ages to find a beaker she would drink from and even longer before she would drink enough from one for me to stop.  In the end by the time she was 11 months we were down to one feed a day in the morning like cfenn has said above I brought her into bed for a feed and some love first thing (also meant I got a bit of a lie in as she was a rather early riser then!) and gradually she became less and less interested.  After the palava with getting her to accept something other than the breast I never thought I would see the day she lost interest!  In the end I was only feeding every other day then one day I stoped doing that.  I really did miss it to begin with and still do even now sometimes, she never sits still enough to cuddle now!  It took about 4 weeks or so for my milk to dry up completely but I didn't suffer mastitis or engorgement which I was worried about and I think stopping slowly helped that. 

I think you can only do what you feel is right for you and Chloe.  If you want to carry on then do, there is nothing wrong with feeding past a year if you want to but if you feel you want to stop or want your body back so to speak there is nothing wrong with that either.  Good luck whatever you decide hun.

Gem and Freya

15/12/2009 at 21:00
Sorry Nat just noticed I mixed Molly and Chloe up lol xx
15/12/2009 at 22:47

ha ha no probs jen

thanks all. still in 2 minds. i think i will see how she reacts to cows milk and will take it from there. haveing 2 children its hard to give the second enough one on one time so i like the time we have together. its nice to be able to cuddle and snuggle together. i know i willprob have that time anyway but its not the same. its nice to feel she still depends on me.

but she stilll seems to like it and its not just me who dosn't want to give up. so i guess i will follow her lead. that is until she starts demanding more. then i wont give it her cos i couldn't bare her to be over dependant!! not like a newborn ha ha

thanks for the advice. once she is on the cows milk i will see how things go and then may try to drop it to one feed. then go from there.

its crazy cos society says "you must breast feed" when you have a newborn. but once they start to toddle its frowned upon. i just guess its down to the individual. we are not ready so i guess time will tell. 

why is this motherhood stuff so hard. whats right and whats wrong! ha ha xxx

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