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Nanny or day care?

8 messages
05/04/2007 at 19:59
I am certain that I want to return to work full time after baby (probably about 4-6 months). What im having trouble with is deciding on a form of childcare (some of you might know im only 17 weeks pregnant at the mo so this is a bit early, but my thoughts go into overdrive sometimes!)
Unsure about a full time nanny, as would feel upset if my child became too attached to someone other than me or their dad. Nursery wouldnt have that problem, but the time they can look after the child is more limited so sorting out work schedules and childcare could be tricky.
What does anyone think?
08/04/2007 at 17:00
Hi Emma, I manage a nursery and would recommend you call the local nurseries in your area and book appointments to go and view them. This will give you a chance to see what there are all about and answer any questions you may have. You may also beable to do this with childminders and then you can compare what feels right.
Although only 17 weeks pregnant its always wise to look early as it will be one less thing to worry about when the little one arrives and if the nurseries are as busy in your area as they are in ours you need to be quick to hold a place.
08/04/2007 at 23:27
what about returning to work part time and having a part time nanny?
with our youngest he was in nursery full time as my wife worked was a supervisor there at the time.
looking back it wasnt the best thing for him at that age but was convienant for us.
my wifes opted not to return to work after our daughter was born but we decided if she did we would have a part time nanny or childminder. as a baby benefits from more adult input than they recieve in a nursery setting.
but then when they get older they benefit from the social aspect of nursery.
10/04/2007 at 18:11
Thanks both for your opinion.
Im in bar management, which obviously involves a fair bit of evening work. My partner would be able to look after the baby then, so I guess the childcare would only have to cover my day shifts. (Which could make having a nanny only part time a possibility).
Think, deep down, some of the reason im struggling to decide on a kind of childcare is I feel a bit guilty using it at all. Know there will be many who think I should stay home and care for my child, but I enjoy my work and having a career is important to me. Know i'll love my baby very much, and going back to work will probably be difficult, but while family means a lot I wont be fulfilled if its the only thing I 'do'.
24/09/2007 at 15:47

Emma please don't think your child attaching to someone other than it's parent is a bad thing. Mum and dad will always be the centre of a babies universe. I know I've worked as a nanny.

A child attaching to its carer is really important and a baby who doesn't have secure attachments will have an insecure  attachment as an adult.  It's important that the baby knows and trusts it's carer and feels secure and this is why many opt for a nanny or a childminder. With nurseies try and get a small ratio of children to carer ie 2:1 or 3 to 1 and check that whilst there under 3 they will have the same carer each time so they can build a relationship. We wouldn't like to go to work each day and meet someone new whom all our needs depended on, we would beging to feel very anxious., so imagine what that would be like for a little one? After all however good each carer is it's a big thing for a little one to understand that everyone does things different and expects different things from them.  

Don't feel guilty about using childcare, many women want or need to carry on working and you've got to do what's best for you and your family. I think it does help to think about how much can't be explained to a child and what sort of care will help them feel safe, secure and you know there getting there needs met like when babys with you.

28/03/2008 at 07:14

It is common to feel some competition with your nanny or caregiver. Whether you use a childcare centre or an in-home caregiver, you may worry “Does my child miss me?” or “Does my child like the nanny more than me?” Just remember that a nanny will never replace you as a parent. The most important thing to remember when feeling worried is that your children can never have too many people in their lives that love and support them. 

28/03/2008 at 09:13
I have always used a nursery, I had my 2 older boys in one. I liked the fact there was more than one person looking after my child, for some reason that felt safer to me. They learned how to play and interact with other children from a very early age too. Like Katie said though you should go and have a look at them before you decide on anything, I looked at one that I would not have liked to have left my child in but the one I decided on they both loved. Good luck. 
30/08/2008 at 10:49
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Well I am a working mum with 2 small boys. I know how hard it is when it comes to leaving your kids in someone else’s care. I too had a problem choosing the right form of childcare. I visited Tinies and they were able to guide me through the different forms of childcare available. Maybe you could visit their local branch and see what they can do for you. Bye and all the best with the pregnancy.

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