Miscarriage & loss
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Coping with miscarriage

A deep sense of grief can follow the loss of a pregnancy, even when it occurs at an early stage

Posted: 8 November 2010
by Kimberley Smith

Whatever stage of pregnancy you suffer miscarriage, it can be a deeply traumatic and emotional experience. It can be made even more difficult if you've been trying to conceive for a long time or have suffered miscarriage before.

From the moment you discovered that you were pregnant you're body and emotions will have been preparing yourself for the task of motherhood. Even if the pregnancy was unplanned or raised difficult questions for you, miscarriage can still bring a huge sense of loss. There are many ways women react. You may feel in shock or numb while many suffer a sense of guilt and helplessness. It's not uncommon to find it difficult to focus or concentrate on anything else and insomnia is also common.

Find out more about the six steps to recovering from a miscarriage.

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Hi everyone,
I've just found out I'm pregnant by home tests, following a missed miscarriage at 14 weeks in February (my first ever pregnancy). My missed miscarriage was discovered at my dating scan, which was a devastating, horrific shock - as I certainly still felt pregnant. I had absolutely no idea that anything had gone wrong.I am truly happy to be pregnant again - but I'm terrified that something will go wrong without me even knowing. I don't have many symptoms of being pregnant, no morning sickness etc. which feels even worse. I'll be seeing my doctor next week, but I guess it's going to be another 3 weeks before I get scanned. I wonder if anyone else out there has been through anything similar and could offer me any advice? It would be much appreciated!!

Posted: 23/05/2006 at 12:13

Hi Bettyboo, I think you'll find quite a few experience contributors here and hopefully some have been through your experience and can offer real tips for you.
I would say (as editor of the site) that whilst it's very hard not to worry – you're probably still dealing with the tragic discovery at your scan in Feb – but miscarriage is rarely a sign that future pregnancies will be problematic.
I really hope for you that you will be able to relax and enjoy some of the real pleasures of pregnancy when you get through that scan, but it's frustrating that you have to wait.
This early in your pregnancy there isn't really a lot midwives etc can do anyway, which is why that first scan is not until 12-14 weeks.
You could buy a doppler (where you can hear your baby through your tummy), but there might be a danger that you become too preoccupied with listening to the beat and, if the baby just decides to lay in a way that makes this sound faint, that you will put yourself through unneccessary worry.
I'm sure you'll be fine and I know the lovely ThinkBaby members will give you much support.
Do keep in touch and let us know how you're doing.

Posted: 24/05/2006 at 15:13

Hi Bettyboo,
I had a missed miscarriage last October when i was 12 weeks pregnant, it was also my first pregnancy and i don't think anyone can ever tell you how it feels unless you have been through it, i was totally shocked and upset by it all. I then fell pregnant more or less straight away and am now 29 weeks pregnant!
I can totally understand your concerns at the moment, when i discovered i was pregnant again, i bled for the first 2 weeks, so i thought the worst, but the best thing to do is just take it easy, eat healthy and try to relax! - I know its easier said than done, but best of luck!

Posted: 08/06/2006 at 09:26

hi there,

i know its been a while since anyone was on this site but i just thought i would share my thoughts. ive just had a miscarriage at 12 weeks, i went to hospital and i had an evacuation procedure done which was a relief. im feeling lots of different emotions which is natural but im going to stay positive cause it didnt take us long to concieve. i also know now that my blood group is o positive which is the most common group.

im now looking forward to relaxing for a bit and see how things go. good luck to everyone!


Posted: 08/09/2006 at 11:29

Hi Bettyboo
I miscarried in February at 10 weeks and I am now nearly 17 weeks pregnant again. I too felt uneasy as I did not feel sick or tired like I did the last time but I put that down to maybe things not being right from the start, I have not had the tiredness or sickness this pregnancy and thus far everything is going good. I did pay for an early scan myslef at 10 weeks for an extra bit of reassurance. Try and take it easy and try and keep busy, the next few weeks will fly in before you know it.

Posted: 08/09/2006 at 11:40

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